I told you so…

It is hard to believe it was 10 years ago this summer I was finally able to get back to school and finish my degree. It had always been my dream to be a teacher. With my brother hounding me, “the only difference in a dream and a goal was putting a date on things”, I finally decided it was time to make that transition – as nerve wracking as it was! Poor Pam Prince – she was my advisor and she was so wonderful. That day when I finally got up the courage to go visit with her I was so scared. What would I do if I actually failed something –remember failure is NOT an option! What would happen if I didn’t fit in or wasn’t liked by the much younger students? As the nerves got the best of me and tears came to my eyes, she so gently patted my hand and kindly offered, “The college also has free counseling for students who need someone to visit with about their struggles.”

Sure enough, I totally forgot how much I disliked early morning classes and my very first class was an 8am Monday/Wednesday Speech class. Looking like a child heading off to kinder that first day, I had my nice new backpack, sharpened pencils and spiral notebooks with my name on them. I had already taken Michael with me to find each one of my classes so I wouldn’t be the lost “old lady” wandering the halls of UTPB looking for my class. I was so nervous I actually got to class that first time almost 30 minutes early, yep once!

As I sat there and listened to the other students, my palms began to sweat even more. It seems, according to the more knowledgeable students, our professor for the class, Dr. Buice, was one of the toughest on campus. Nothing kind or loving was being said and as the minutes passed, my nerves were getting the best of me. What had I gotten myself into? Was this a test to see if I had what it was going to take to actually finish school? Didn’t God know how weak I was? Why was I doing this to myself?

As the semester progressed, I came to realize Dr. Buice was strong, competent, demanding and unwavering. She expected the very best of us and was going to do what it took to help us reach our goals. She often pointed out how much easier it is to talk about what you know. Consequently, our class became well acquainted with each other’s likes/dislikes; talents; views on politics and what made each other tick.

There was no question - she was the ruler of our classroom. Her critiques of our speeches were considered by many to be harsh but that wasn’t how I saw things. She was like a true friend who always said what needed to be said instead of what we wanted to hear, no matter how difficult it was for us. To say Dr. Buice was always professional and businesslike is like saying the desert is dry – it is the obvious. Through it all, I learned to respect her as I envied her strength.

It wasn’t long before my speech class actually became one of my favorites. I enjoyed pleasing her and the attempts to reach her high standards. On one certain occasion I actually showed up at her office to discuss possibly changing my major to something along the lines of communication. Thinking on how much I was enjoying the class, it just seemed the natural conclusion. Wrong thing to do! I will never forget sitting in that leather chair with her eyes glaring through me as if I had sprung two heads! It was then, that afternoon she pointed out to me, reminded me, why I had returned to college – to be a teacher. Hearing Dr. Buice actually tell me in her opinion, education was the right choice for me was like having Van Gogh say I was an artist; Robert Frost compliment a short story; or even possibly Nolan Ryan comment on a strike out! Dr. Buice had spoken.

Sure enough, I stayed with my art and education, never considering another change. I didn’t see her very often through the next few years but when I did, her smile and friendly greeting was always something special. At our graduation ceremonies hearing her tell me how proud she was of me and she was expecting great things, was just a reminder of what a true teacher means to their students. Periodically, our paths would cross the next few years and there was really never time to actually sit and catch up. The last time I saw Dr. Buice, she was a bit different – almost bubbly. The Education Foundation had delivered their grants and my name had been attached to three different grants. She never said the words but that look on her face was all I needed. I knew it was one time she wasn’t going to critique things but it was a reminder of her telling me to stay in education. Who knows why she didn’t come right out and say “I told you so!” It wasn’t really in her character to hold back her thoughts but I knew, just as she knew, she did. Yes, thank goodness she did tell me what I needed to hear.

While searching for information on the inauguration yesterday, I learned of her passing. Though I will always be grateful for the example she set as an educator, I am more grateful for her demands on me as a person, a student. Her expectations were always high, for herself as well as for her students. She demanded we reach higher not only in class but in life as well. When I tell my students I am queen of my domain and I wear an invisible crown, it is easy to see her chuckle. Yes I can even hear her encourage me to push them on to higher standards and a better life. Yes, Dr. Buice, you told me so and I thank you!

Lee Rhoads Buice
January 20, 2009 - 12:31 AM
ODESSA Lee Rhoads Buice, 76 of Odessa, died Monday, Jan. 19, 2009, at Hospice House.
Services will be at a later date. Arrangements are by Hubbard-Kelly Funeral Home.
She was born in Cardiff, Wales, United Kingdom.
SURVIVORS Sons, Don Holloway, Burt Holloway and Mark Holloway; daughter, Laura Nugent.

NOTE: A memorial service for Dr. Lee Buice is set for Friday afternoon, January 23, 2009 at 2:00 p.m. at CrossRoads church.